Watch Your Mouth!

[Fr_Tom]

Every now and then some driver will get all worked up in traffic. It is probably because I am driving too slow most of the time. It could be because of the carbon footprint of the fleet of clunker V8 cars I drive. Maybe it is the "Episcopal Church Welcomes You" bumper sticker. Perhaps it is an anticlerical sentiment or someone who does not approve of smoking. Whatever it is, I will get a variety of hand gestures and some words that are probably NOT on this list mouthed at me. I always bless them and make the sign of the cross. In Luke 6:28 (and elsewhere) it tells us to "bless those who curse you."

I am not sure if this works any better than soap, but it is what I am told to do.

[Tsal]

There are a few we can't say on the west coast for fear of offending the perpetually offended.. Cotton Pickin' for instance, is a no go. Shizzle also, depending on the crowd, could be considered "cultural appropriation" if you are white and say it. My grandpa's favorite would definitely be offensive(aside from profusely swearing in Dutch).. "Son of a bean-pickin' Eskimo". However, you can say the usual swear words here without offending..

Edit.. wanted to also include my Mom's favorite: "Sugarfoot!"

Sugarfoot is a good one. I use it to insult drivers over the CB. Makes them crazy! Lol

I always call em Nancy, gets them worked up pretty good I use that on junior drivers who get a bit squeamish on the tight mountain roads too. Usually gets them over their fear (C’mon Nancy, I backed her down there half drunk with one eye open and yer momma chewin on my ear askin for more).

Getting drivers all fired up is great entertainment. Lol... You gotta hear some of the stuff people come up with out here. Especially the port jockey's(container guys). Priceless..

[oldbill]

I grew up listening to George Carlin and Richard Pryor and I was a Houston Oiler fan,... needless to say I learned and mastered the art of cussing at an early age.

[Scap]

Saw this one yesterday.

[oldbill]

Saw this one yesterday.

LOL! Having lived around Texas women all of my life I've heard the above phrase many times and it certainly does have more of a "shut up you pathetic moron" meaning than the kind hearted one that it sounds like on it's face and is a warning that she's had about enough. When however, "bless your heart" escalates to "oh HELL NO" then the recipient of the message should probably leave quickly because usually as she is uttering those words she is likely reaching into the night stand where she keeps her .357 with the pink camo grips!

[Whalehead King]

The phrase, "Kiss My Grits," jumped off the list at me so I wanted to find a clip of Flo saying, "Kiss my grits!' It only sounds dirty in a family-friendly sitcom.

I was going to wax poetic about kissing Flo's grits, something which I was never tempted to do, whatever she meant by her grits. I'd rather not think about it. Flo never put cream in my coffee the way Vera did.

I did find a clip of Flo saying, "Kiss my grits!" but then I found another clip from the comedy classic 'Alice' which totally resembles just bout any day in my life. Something very similar happened to me today but the bartenders name was Alicia, not Vera. The main differences are that I usually wear a necktie with my vest, I have a full head of hair when I wear a hat, and, no one lights a cigarette for me nowadays. Starstruck waitresses light my pipe.



Who loves ya, baby?

[Ruffinogold]

I'm afraid I can't use any of those , it's a f'in shame . I try to use them but the others always come out . I like bastid , pansy ass and schmuck . When someone really drops the ball at work , i tell them to quit riding the baloney pony . If they're young and stupid , I'll just shake my head and say , F"'in millennial . If they're older and stupid , I'll usually say something like... well , in our number of years , that's like the 200,000th mistake .. oh well

[Preacher1611]

There's a few on there I actually use, "For crying out loud" is one I use a lot.

[Kevin Keith]

There's a few on there I actually use, "For crying out loud" is one I use a lot.

I use a lot of them. Lots of people don't tolerate in mixed company what flies among the menfolk.

[Bamarick]

Saw this one yesterday.

LOL, I think that's exactly what happened